Duck Cleaning Again

Alex called a few days ago. I’d forgotten his name. And he had forgotten me.

On the previous occasion Alex called I had a very enjoyable conversation. That’s not the way he would have described it. He was so upset with me that he hung up without saying goodbye.

Alex is a telemarketer. I understand people don’t like telemarketers so I am always polite to them. I try to brighten their day. Unfortunately, what I use for a sense of humour sometimes rubs people the wrong way. My wife tells me I’m not funny, though she laughed all the way through my first conversation with Alex.

He was calling about setting up an appointment to have my ducts cleaned.  It seems to be a favourite telemarketing topic, I’ve had to deal with it before. I’ve even had my ducts cleaned – but not by someone who cold-called me.

As on the previous occasion, I told Alex I was glad he had called. I told him that my ducks needed cleaning. (There are ducks in the stream that runs outside my front door. Somewhere I have pictures of them, but couldn’t find them when I looked.) I asked if he charged per duck.

At that point he remembered me. He didn’t spend time trying to convince me that he had said “duct” not “duck.” He probably thought he was having a flashback to a horrible experience. He hung up without saying another word.

I wonder if telemarketers have their own version of a “do not call” list, people that they don’t want to bother because those people are adept at messing around with the telemarketer’s heads. Would they share the list with other telemarketers, or is the industry too cutthroat?

If there is such a list, I suspect Alex has now put me on it.



  1. Had a Microsoft Windows call from Rupia this morning. Told them I only had Mac computers.

  2. Yes, I know about that list – my maternal grandmother was on it. She would invite them in, and by the time they left they had become Christians.

  3. Not sure if they have such a list, but I’m fairly confident the Jehovah’s Witnesses have a “do not approach” list and my house is on it.

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