A Matter of Survival

How do I get on these email lists? I have no idea. The sad thing is, I’m not paranoid enough to really appreciate them when I do read them.

The ones offering me various weapons to protect myself, just in case, I usually delete unread. Guns don’t kill people. However I have the impression people who buy guns to protect themselves are frequently responsible for others’ deaths because they don’t store the weapons properly. Children don’t know life isn’t a cartoon. But I digress.

The header on this email was “Outrage Over Survival Food.” Outrage is bound to catch my attention. Having read it, I discovered my preparations for the coming emergency are all wrong. To start with, I hadn’t even realized there was a coming emergency! (As I wrote this I did an internet search on the organization that sent me the email. I have decided not to name them or link to their website. A quick glance tells me that these people are so right wing that they would consider the Tea Party as ultra-leftist. Perhaps racist xenophobes would be a fitting descriptor.)

According to the email, survival food is selling out all across the country. Could be – there’s never any in my grocery store. Okay, maybe there is, I’ve just never looked for it. I think for many people beer and pizza would be popular choices, but that isn’t what was meant. Apparently there is specific survival food, based, I guess, on military rations. That doesn’t sound terribly appealing; I’ve never met a soldier who had much good to say about field rations.

“We tested the top survival food and you’ll be shocked at what we found. Watch the controversial video before it disappears again.” (I didn’t bother to watch.)

“Some people out there think folks like you & me are a bit “strange”.” Indeed we do.

“They think having a food stockpile ready for a natural disaster is something they can put off for “someday” or “never”. But those people are just hiding their heads in the sand. They are dead wrong — and you are dead right. You’ve seen the evidence and you know the situation is way too serious not to do something about.”

I know fear-mongering when I see it. I also know what resources are available during a natural disaster in North America. If you don’t have a supply of food in the house you might get a little hungry before help arrives, but you are unlikely to starve to death. I suspect were not talking a natural disaster here, a flood or earthquake; we’re preparing for Armageddon, or at least an invasion.

The warnings go on and on. Turns out though that there is good news. If you click on the link (which didn’t actually work when I clicked on it, isn’t that ironic) you can have the opportunity to purchase special survival food that will keep fresh for 25 years. (From the food company’s name I see an invasion implication, or maybe I’m the paranoid one. I noticed no prices were given. That’s why I wanted to click on the link. Some research has shown mixed reactions to the product.)

“You can make these meals in less than 20 minutes; just add boiling water, simmer, and serve. I tried ‘em and I think they taste as good or better than any other survival food I’ve EVER had.” (Where do you find clean water in a disaster zone? That is a bigger survival question. You can go a long time without food, not so long without water. And why are you eating survival food? Shouldn’t you be saving it for that upcoming disaster?)

“If you don’t take action to get your food stockpile right now, you’ll be in the same boat as the brainwashed masses who think “everything is fine.” And if a crisis hits and your family asks, “What are we going to eat?” your mouth will go dry and you’ll feel powerless.”

“Listen, I can’t predict the future. I don’t know exactly when or how a crisis will hit. But from everything I see, it could be soon and it could be a big one.” (Obviously the guy who wrote this can predict earthquakes.)

I’m looking for feedback here. Do you think I should be stockpiling food (and other supplies), just in case? Or is it safe to just take my chances?


One comment

  1. I would definitely stockpile food in case I’ll get hungry during midnight. That’s a disaster my mom doesn’t want to see. But seriously, I’ve had a lot of unnecessary emails but nothing as incredibly interesting as this one.

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