Turns Out I’m Dead

I’ve been feeling a little tired as 2020 draws to a close. You too perhaps – it has been a stressful year.

Turns out I’m not as tired as I feel. I’m actually dead. That is me in the picture.

This comes as a great surprise to me. I don’t feel dead. I don’t remember dying.

Thursday though my son texted me to let me know that according to Google I am dead. Which goes to show you can’t always believe what you read on the internet.

For some reason, when you search for former NHL player Lorne Anderson Google attaches my picture to your search. And he’s been dead since 1984.

I have no idea how or why they would do that. I have pointed out the error. Who knows how long it will take to correct it.

When I worked for The Pembroke Observer back in the late 1980s my work would sometimes take me to Renfrew, the hometown of hockey goalie Lorne Anderson. Occasionally I was asked if we were related. (We weren’t – he was Lawrence, even though the called him Lorne.)

In Canada being related to an NHL player adds to your social status, though maybe not in this case. Lorne Anderson the goalie is indeed in the Hockey Hall of Fame, despite only playing three games in his NHL career.

That is because in his final game he allowed Bill Mosienko to score the fastest hat trick in NHL history. Three goals in 21 seconds. Not something to be proud of. That record has stood since 1952. There aren’t many NHL records still standing from that time.

I don’t think we were related. Anderson is a fairly common surname after all. But I wouldn’t be ashamed if we were.

After all, the man played n the NHL. He was a goaltender back in the days when there were only six NHL teams, with each one carrying only one goalie. Yes, he was a late-season replacement and didn’t last long at that level, but he was nonetheless an elite goaltender. That was proven the following season when he won the Allan Cup.

However I still want Google to get it right.



  1. Can I get your autograph, or is it too late?

    1. Given that I am dead, the price has gone up. Can you afford it?

  2. Who knows how bots think? You may have just perpetuated the conflation.

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