How do I get on these mailing lists?

Dear Fellow Gun Owner,
As a gun owner you understand the importance of being prepared for trouble. And unlike liberals… you get the “vigilance” thing without a lot of lectures. In fact…
That’s why I’m writing to you.

I have been regularly or at least semi-regularly receiving emails from American groups that strike me as being a little scary, such as the one calling itself “Americans’ Right to Arms.” As a Canadian I don’t have a constitutional right to own whatever weapon I please. Neither do Americans, but few in that country have the intestinal fortitude to properly interpret their constitution.

This particular email wasn’t all that much about guns, but about electricity. Apparently President Obama is working on creating an electricity crisis, and the only way responsible gun owners can prevent that is by buying a solar generator from this group.

For 48 hours only — we will sell 14 brand new, “never-been-out-of-the-box” solar generators for just $995.00 plus shipping and handling.
Seriously, I can tell you “straight-up” that we lose money on each sale at this price. (The retail price is $3295.00)
Why only 14 units? Well to put it bluntly, even though I’m excited about getting the word out about solar generators, losing money long term is something I’m just plain uncomfortable with.

Doesn’t that just tempt you? Especially because these aren’t just any solar generators, they are special.

But first… I know what you’re thinking… so let me cut that off at the pass… don’t think that because I call it a “solar generator” that I’m some tree hugging, save the co-dependent lesbian whales guy. I’m not and it’s not. Nope. It’s not that kind of solar.

I guess it’s the kind of solar gun owners use. To me all electricity is pretty much he same. From the picture it looked very much like the solar generators I saw in refugee camps in Iraq. Of course there they don’t have guns, or at least none that I saw, so it must really be a different type of solar.

The marketing pitch interested me. Create a climate of fear in people’s minds then offer a generator as a solution. Funny thing is, there are numerous good reasons to consider buying a generator, and a solar one does make sense for a lot of people. And those who raise concerns about the vulnerability of the power grid to terrorist attack are just stating the obvious.

You Own A Gun To Protect Yourself And Your Family Just Like I Do. So I Know You’re Not Afraid To Pull The Trigger If You Have To…

When I get an email from American neo-fascist praising me for being a gun owner I have to wonder about their knowledge of me. It is possible that they may not be as wing-nut as they seem, but gun-obsessed people make me nervous. I live in a city. Therefore I have no need to own a gun. There are no bears or wolves threatening my livestock because I have no livestock. And while Ottawa has become increasingly violent in some people’s eyes, the fact is that compared to a similar-sized American city we are crime free. I certainly don’t need a gun. I might need a solar generator, but I won’t be buying one from these guys – they seem one step away from terrorists. Or maybe they are just slick businessmen and don’t believe a word they put in their emails.

I could ask to be removed from the distribution list, but two things stop me. The first is that I don’t want to get on the bad side of anyone so obviously unstable. That could be risky. The second reason is that I find them amusing. I probably wouldn’t think that though if they were my neighbours.